8 years
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Last night, I went on a second date with my dance partner out in San Francisco, and we spent 12 hours together going to a regetta race, having Chinese soup, go a Art and music festival, and a valentine poetry night. We came back to my place so that she could use the bathroom, and after which I showed her around place and sat on the sofa together. From there I started giving her a one hour back and foot massage, and after that we started to make out and she gave me a little f*******. This was unexpected and I did not ask for such a thing, but we were kissing so passionately that I felt that I needed to express myself to her after spending 12 hours and a additional hour massaging her, but it was my first time being given a f******* and I don’t understand why I should feel so bad or dirty about it. This was not my intention but it was something that just happened for the first time in my life, and I feel as though I needed it to help me be comfortable in my own body and express my caged intimacy with someone. I haven’t told anyone about this and I should keep it to myself from here on in, and I am still going to meet with my dance partner and treat her like a genuine lady and be respectable to her.

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When I was younger, about 16, I was insatiable and as a result of having my first anonymous hookup with another kid that was 16 (off omegle of all things) I sought to have more.
In this effort I downloaded Grindr and lied about being 18, eventually finding someone who hosted an anon darkroom not even 5 minutes away and who was more than happy leaving their door unlocked and a** ready. After I was invited over and tentatively entered their place I immediately set about u*********, going to nothing in a minute and slowly started up the steps to his room. Once in his room I was approached in the dark by him – a 30-something yr old man who was equally as naked but twice my size – and he reached down and started to blow me once he settled on his knees. Within minutes once I was sufficiently erect I prodded him onto the bed and had him bend over, eventually sliding in without any additional lubrication and begun to – at the age of 16 – f*** this older mans a**. I went for about 20 minutes by my estimation and slowly over the course of the f****** went from doggy, to sideways to having him lie fully down whilst I went to town on him.
Eventually I finished in him and got up and left. Once home I gushed to him about how much fun it was and how I appreciated him taking a chance with me, with some more conversation eventually leading to my age being revealed and – to my own surprise – him revealing that he’d prefer it if we kept going in spite of it. I’d meet him continuously, probably once to 3 times a month or even multiple times in the same week until I moved away at 18. I never saw his face but I remember being inside him so vividly.