• 5 years ago
  • 411 Views

My very first s***** experience was with a man I would spend 8 years with. I was 12 when we met in a chat room and 14 when we had s** for the first time. He was my first and 55 years old.

My parents split when I was a baby. My dad ended up in prison for 20 years for major drug trafficking. My mom left me with my grandmother to live her life. I grew up in a rural deep south town. My grandmother was murdered when I was 14 during a robbery. I was sent to back to my mother to live. Her boyfriend and I didn’t get along so the man I met online sent me a greyhound ticket to Miami to live with him in south beach. He was obsessed with me almost as I was with him. I was instantly in love because no one seemed to care about me as much as he did other than my grandmother. I met him a shy awkward virgin with low self esteem. By the time I was 15, my hips had spread and my breast grew a bit. I had been living with him for a year. He picked everything I wore (which was usually very tight/short/revealing clothes) he chose who I interacted with usually strippers from the local clubs. I was forbid to wear sneakers or flip flops, only heels were acceptable. He was also part of an magical society called OTO which participated in “ritualistic s** magick.” He did h******* drugs and had s** with me in the most degrading ways (f******, d*********, cattle prodding, g******** and orgys, frequent visits to lifestyle clubs, b****** and more). At age 16 he decided I needed to help pay bills. He arranged for me to be a dancer at a club owned by his friend near Fort Lauderdale. He had many friends in high places including the mayor, top ranking law enforcement and judges. I worked there for 2 years averaging 500-2000 on average nights and for big events or “winter tourist season” I made more. At 16 he paid for various plastic surgeries for me in foreign countries that did not care my age. My breasts went from a full C to a very b**** DD. I had a BBL and braces also. All of which was very painful and I was still pressured to s******* please him although I was recovering from surgery. He told me my breast were botched as I had a calcification in my left breast and it did bit drop like my right breast. So I endured another painful foreign breast job to correct that. While in the OTO cult I was pressured to perform s***** acts with men and women as part of the ranking degrees. I performed in many orgys at various “lifestyle” clubs in Florida. Many of the people I performed with were people in high places in this world. Doctors, lawyers, judges, local politicians etc. By the age of 18 I got into the p*** industry briefly on and off for 2 and a half years. I stayed in the industry long enough to be nominated for AVN awards. Everywhere I went he followed. By the age of 21 I left the adult industry and spent more time moving up the ranks of OTO. By the age of 22. We had a huge fight because I began to rebel and couldn’t take his controlling behavior any longer. So I left. He tried to call me back a few times but I brushed it off. I still live in FL but at a more rural central FL residence. I have since received about 4 years of therapy and counting. I used to think I wanted all that and therefore I wasn’t a victim of s***** abuse but in reality I was a child from a broken home with low self-esteem and a personality disorder which is perfect bait for such an individual. I am now happily married with 1 child and another on the way and have since obtained my GED and finished all my nursing school prereqs and begin nursing school soon.

All Comments

  • sorry to hear that, but in the end it turned out ok?

    Anonymous January 7, 2019 1:55 pm Reply
  • I think you must report him to the authority. Becuz if you don’t, you will not be his and their last victim.
    Of course you are a victim! Just report him, and leave all the rest to the police.

    Anonymous January 7, 2019 2:09 pm Reply
  • Oh really… what’s your porn name? Should be easy to confirm this one if you were nominated for an AVN award.

    Anonymous January 9, 2019 4:31 am Reply
  • I’m so glad things turned around for you.

    Anonymous January 11, 2019 4:50 pm Reply
  • I am so sorry you went through all that. I know all about OTO — they are a cancer, like everything else Crowley ever touched. But I just wanted to say, because I’m sure you never heard it enough: I’m really proud of you for getting through all that and finding happiness.

    Anonymous January 11, 2019 11:21 pm Reply

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