Linda, 2 years ago I developed a huge crush on you at a retreat we were both at. One day it just hit me watching you stand straight up striking the board. Then I noticed what great hips and a great a** you have. I enjoyed watching you walking around those few days. And I just love your laugh. I’m married, so I never said or did anything. And it took me the better part of a year to get over that crush. But that a**… damn! If you knew and asked me to eat or f*** your p**** or a** (any or all of the above), you wouldn’t have to ask me twice.

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