I wish Mr.Fantastic/Reed Richards would stretch his dong from the United States to the United Kingdom, aiming it at Emma Watson’s face, but taking the longest route possible. His fantastic c*** would go through windows, block streets, create an impromptu bridge from the United States to Asia.

Emma would be fixated on it, like Gollum and the ring. The whole world would unite as one to collaboratively jack him off. Kids hanging off it like a branch from a tree, firemen climbing it as if they’re ascending a ladder, construction and office workers, teachers, and paramedics. Dancers that are all moonwalking on it, the cast of Game Of Thrones doing a live episode right by the shaft, the 49ers versus the Broncos playing a sweaty game near the sack.

Then ……. THEN THE THING YELLS “IT’S CLOBBERING TIME” and gives it the final stroke.

Emma is blasted through a brick wall with her body imprint left behind like a cartoon and is never seen again.

The left over j*** is slowly falling out of the sky like snow. Little boys and girls catch flakes of it on their tongues as their parents look on by a warm fire with some nice hot cocoa.

Mr.Fantastic’s member quickly retracts like a tape measurer inside his stomach where it will stay for another 100 years.

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