I watch the nastiest p*** I can find. I fantasize about dirty, sordid, one-time s**. With older men. I lost my virginity when I was 12. I pierce myself. I have such a need for attention, and I won’t deny it anymore. I need to be loved.

My boyfriend is 24, and was a virgin until he met me. He had a stroke last year, and currently his heart is at 30% function. He is attentive, and tries to please me, especially in bed. But the fact that he is so inexperienced, and his heart is weak means the s** isn’t as rough as I would like. I want to be t******, beaten. I can’t ask him to push his physical limits, but I am unsatisfied.