I feel like no one cares and loves me. I am 23 years old. I have not done anything I consider to be an accomplishment. It seems like everyone else have people around them who supports and loves them. I don’t have a support system. I don’t have friends. I’m alone in this journey of life. I know for a fact that if I were to go missing no one would notice. My mom would not worry because she would not notice.
I am a loving person but more and more I feel dislike and disgust for others when I see them happy, being surrounded by those who love them. Typing that I just realize that must be what jealousy/envy is. I feel alone. I feel this heavy sadness in my chest.
People say you must love yourself in order for someone to love you. Well I love myself. I don’t know if they are talking about a friend or a lover. I need a friend. Not a lover/boyfriend. I want a friend. Someone to talk to. To hangout with. I’ve reached out to old friends I had in high school by talking to them. Putting it out there that I’m there for them to talk to about anything. Problems or just random things. But it seems that they are not there for me when I need someone to talk to.
Is it bad that I want to be there for someone AND hope that they be there for me too?
I guess I will be alone in my 23 years old life. I’ve somewhat accepted it. I just needed to get it out.