i am living in the south. i am broke unemployed and broke down, no vehicle. i live with my estranged girl friend her sister and brother in law. in the few

12 years

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i am living in the south. i am broke unemployed and broke down, no vehicle. i live with my estranged girl friend her sister and brother in law. in the few months i have been here i have come to understand that he is slightly smarter and has the same habits and intellect of a neanderthal. he is literally one of the stupidest and most violent people i have ever met.
he has recently attacked me and swore that he would kill me, twice, in front of witnesses. i believe he will. i believe i will not live to see christmas.
each day we do not speak, everyone here is on edge. i have lost 15 pounds due to lack of food, of which there is little, the fact that the two of them eat for four, and stress.
i am a virtual prisoner here.

New Confession

I wish I knew others that had experienced this before. You dated someone just to find out they’re a narcissist that ends up replacing you with a dangerous criminal and within months the criminal passes away. This criminal wanted to write me a letter using a relatives mailing address and my relative said that she wasn’t getting involved in drama. I forgive but in the back of my mind,I question if God protected me from serious harm. Why do I feel as though this person faked their death and has actually left America when the website for the funeral home is trustworthy and they wouldn’t keep fake obituaries? Why do I feel my ex will find someone else to finish a dirty deed the previous and deceased partner had planned? Seriously, I wonder if anyone else had this experience before.

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I have a deep hate for the self help industry because it’s like its own type of religion…if you just believe and work hard enough, you’ll go to success heaven. I fell for it hard for awhile in the early 2000’s with my attention and money until I finally started opening my eyes to the patterns of BS. One of the patterns I started noticing were wealthy successful people in interviews talk about their similar “homeless to billionaire” origin stories that put them in a light of how hard they worked and scraped to get to where they are now, but almost nothing about the actual steps in between. Step 1: had nothing. Step 2: worked hard. Step 3: billionaire! It drove me nuts because I always ended up with the thought “but how did you actually get there?” They sell the idea of success because everybody loves the rags to riches story and it wouldn’t be so inspiring if they were thoroughly honest about what was available to them that isn’t for most people.