I am a married man, and I cheat on my husband. I love him with all my heart, yet find myself looking for s** in other places outside of our relationship. I would not want to hurt my husband, and the thought of doing so makes me very sad. I also drink too much and have started smoking pot again, which leads me to obsessive behavior that isn’t healthy for me. I am also walking a fine line at work, and think that I have alienated my peers. It all feels very overwhelming at times, and God seems very far away. I have the power to change my life, I just don’t always believe that in my heart.