I am a software engineer. This is my first job. When i first came i came with my college mates. We were around 7.. 3 of us went into relationship and i was alone. But i never thought about it. The fact was they all already were in a relationship. Most of them. So they were kinda cheating. Then some problems started coming up. There was one couple who became my good friends. The problems started coming up between them and i started supporting the girl just because of the fact that she was a girl. Anyways, they broke. I started saying the girl was like my sister thats why i helped her. And things got on well.. We became best friends.. But after an year, I started having feelings for her. S*******. Thats why i started seeing a psycologist. She told me that woman was not good for me so i had to stay away. But i was really confused with the feelings i was having. One side i told her she was my sister and on the other hand i masturbated with her on my mind. i was so damn confused. I was told again and again to stay away but it became too difficult. Whenever i started to bring some distance she started saying, “do u have any problems with me?” “I know i am the worst person in your life”.. So just not to feel her bad i started saying no there was no problem. I was just making myself more comfortable and cosier, unconciuosly. Then one day her roomate was away. She always feared sleeping alone. So i called her home to sleep with us. With my roomate and me. 2 of our friends also came. So she was the only girl and we were all boys. I was sleeping right beside her. Somehow intentionally i had planned that i would touch her b**** today. At night, I started touching them, pressing them. I put my hands inside her bums and started pressing them too. I did that whole night. But I don’t know why she never told me naything that night. In the morning she got up and she told i want to go home. I asked her for the reason. But she told she didnt want to talk to me and just want to go home. She knew. I messaged her afterwards and apologised. But she told she would never forgive me entire life. I am guilty. But i couldn’t control that day. My psycologist told why didnt she tell you at the night itself? May be she was also enjoying. I dont know how to react. I am just too guilty of what i have done. ashamed. We are in the same office and i try not see her. I done a sin. 🙁