I am jealous as hell. It’s something I would absolutely never admit out loud, and I have no business saying anything about it, but lately I just feel like the most petty, immature person the world has ever had the misfortune to process. I have a great life and everything is going well for me, and yet I’m looking around at friends of mine hanging out with friends of theirs I don’t particularly like and just getting SICK with petty jealousy. There’s a guy I casually hook up with sometimes that I’m not super interested in, but lately if I don’t hear from him for a while I feel like… I’m supposed to be the one who’s indifferent about YOU. I see a girl I used to be friends with and kind of had under my wing for a long time taking over a program I used to direct back in my home town, and I feel like Regina George: “I like INVENTED her.”

Haha, I would be totally DISGUSTED by these thoughts coming from someone else, and I’m definitely still disgusted with them from myself, but I can’t seem to help it. They’re there. And there is absolutely no one I would ever tell about this, so… thanks for listening, internet.