jesus its been a while since i last posted. probably around a year now. if it matters at all i think i’ve changed, or at least i hope i’ve changed. Yk over my time of using this website ive had 4 main dilemas, and all of them weren’t worth my time, the last boy, joe, he was wonderful, honestly, as much as i’ve smacked talked him about his inability to trust me or talk to me he did treat me well. but he left, he moved across the world about a month ago.
I think he was my favourite.
We were going to try make it work long distance but i chickened out before he landed. i feel guilty for that. But i have come to the conclusion that it really is not my problem, my whole issue over the years has been that i thought i needed someone to make me a good person, that i needed someone to be complete. Honestly, its stupid to think that way, i dont need people im doing great on my own, i have three jobs and i’ve stabilised all my family relationships, ill admit i’ve gone quite a bit downhill at school but thats easily fixed.
I think this is the final point of my childhood.
Although it was arguably lost many years ago i think im finally losing that little girl who just needed approval, all i need is myself now. and for that i am proud.
I do wonder if anyone who sees this has been here as long as i have, i wonder if theres anyone out there who will see this and remember the old confessions about phoebe and keyler ollie joe and even leon.
If you do remember me i hope your a little proud, i hope that in some weird way maybe i help you realise you dont need someone to validate you, life is too short to sit bitching and whining about some boy you once loved

-your favourite kinda fucked up teen :)(: