12 years
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I have a confession…I cheated on my boyfriend of 2 years with a guy i hardly even know. I’m in the US Airforce and have been away from my love for way to long with boot camp and then tech school following there after, it seems like a lifetime had gone by until I will eventually see him again. It wasn’t suppose to happen, I love my boyfriend but some how I lost control of myself, my morals, my values. I cheated with a guy that I hardly know and to make it even worse, I think it was because he reminded me of my boyfriend, they look almost near identical and had similar tastes and styles. That probably makes it ten time worse! At the time of the cheating I felt no regret to remorse, nothing, I was just young and dumb and having fun! But soon after me and this guy had a falling out and I realized how stupid I was all along, he was an a****** and I played right into his little game of getting whatever he wanted from me. How could I have been so stupid and dumb and naive after 2 years of being faithful, I felt ashamed. Not to mention that soon after this guy graduated tech school leaving me in the dust, yet always text me or tried to contact me to rekindle the spark. Then one Saturday morning I wake to find that this entire time, he too was in a relationship and what do you know, upon graduating he got married. It burned me up inside to think that he could cheat on his girlfriend with me yet it made me feel even worse that I cheated on my boyfriend yet him, he seems to feel no regret while me on the other hand, feel like the guilt is eating me alive. Confessions of a cheater…

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I f****** hate you (bf) , you f****** manipulative,hypocrite, emotionally abusive, vaping, life draining, wannabe player b******. I.HATE YOU. I still deeply resent you. This is why everyone thinks you’re an a****** at your job. You’re not some anti-hero that you claimed to be. No- You’re just an a******. Point blank . Especially to me of all people! You always take it out on me, and you still wonder why I won’t touch you like that or shut down completely with you. Everytime you sense or feel even an inch that im happy, peaceful, something I enjoy doing you immediately smash that down so you can feel better and have power over me. What’s funny is that every time you’re in the wrong, overstep your boundaries, make me really upset or talk crap to me – karma smacks you right in the face everytime & you don’t even realize it. Funny how you’ve said yourself that people spit at the sky just for it to come back-yet you’ve done the exact same thing too – you’re not godlike or safe from getting karma, even I’ve dealt with karma too when I was in the wrong many times too. So no- you’re not a misunderstood dark knight turn bad like the joker you claim to be. You’re just an egotistical bigoted jerk & everyone can see that except you. I hate myself that I fell for your facade – lovebomb trap years ago . And all the times that you’ve talked crap about other’s appearances, especially women’s, karma yet again smacked you in the face & put on a ton of weight and still wonder why you haven’t lost pounds but still continue on demanding me to cook & make you even more food despite you complaining about it , hmmmm , gee I wonder why. Anyways , glad to vent that out .