I found a real friend. I don’t know why, but he’s painstakingly held on even through me running through my usual runnings away from him. I love him. I let him do his own thing, watch him try to put me last, but always return to me through everything. I don’t know why I love him the way I do, I just do. I want to care for him while I watch him stumble and face hard things, keeping my distance so he never has to show me anything too negative or shameful. I’ve watched us hurt each other yet stick by each other to a comfortable place. You can come near me and be with me, but you have to accept I have my friend and you very likely can’t change that. There is no reason to be scared of being hurt. I am all about sharing the love and the more the merrier. Take me or leave me, I am who I am and these are the facts. I’m insecure for no reason. If you make friends with other women or sincerely date them, I don’t want you. I’m selfish and I know it, and I don’t care. I don’t like to be pressured, I like to be free to be me. I have the luxury of doing it because of my many suitors. I do nothing to get them, I simply love living and they are just there. So. . there’s that. If you’re insecure, you have every reason to be scared with me, but I’m insecure and scared too. Really.