My husband came out to me on Sunday as trans (mtf, me cis f). We have two children. I love the person I married, but I am not sure I want to be married to

4 years

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My husband came out to me on Sunday as trans (mtf, me cis f). We have two children. I love the person I married, but I am not sure I want to be married to a woman. I feel tremendous guilt at this feeling and I am not sure how to move on or what my next step should be. I feel so many emotions: upset, guilt, love, loathing, anger, devastation, compassion, honoured. I know that I need to move past this, but today that just seems hard. I know I signed up for this (for better, for worse, till death we do part etc) and I want my love to be happy more than anything- they deserve that, but I feel like my presence is currently hindering that.

New Confession

i didnt know my partner had a girlfriend when i asked him out 3 years ago. he said yes and broke things off with her. he says he felt trapped in their relationship and that it was almost over anyway, but i feel guilty. they were long distance for over 2 years and only met in person for the first time a few months before i came into the picture. now we talk about getting married and i fear one day i will lose him the same way i gained him.

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For years my sister and I would hold our brother down and hurt his balls so much that he would cry for mom to come save him but she not once made us stop. My sister would force his underwear out of the way while I would knee him and she would hit him. It was fun and it REALLY turned me on but as an adult I have a kink now about getting my v**** and c*** smashed the same way. I really want my brother to do it to me as revenge since we’re grown up but I don’t know what it would take. I’ve let him see me in my p****** quite a lot and even tried taunting him but he doesn’t seem interested in it. I don’t know what it takes to get guys interested in that.