Yeah, “no hate needed just love” doesn’t matter…

That was f*** all compared to the hurt I felt, dished out, and gave to myself because I was a stupid boy who didn’t know any better. I appreciate, but what you talk is not hurt. It isn’t real or deep enough to be hurt. 3 women, and one of them hurt me worse than I hurt her which in my opinion neutralized it. Not an excuse, it does not dismiss my behaviours, I wish I would have handled it better, but s*** happens when s*** is dysfunctional. I suppose I regret, but it doesn’t put me in the fetal position questioning what the f*** I did, like the other 2.

The other 2, I acknowledge my carelessness, I regret more than they’ll know, I lost. I was blessed, far more blessed than a lot of people, early, it was real, they are the reason I am as picky as I am in life, because I like most people know much better from waaaaaaaaaaay back. I know what it is, what I isn’t, and what it’s all about unlike most, who are f****** clueless. I disregarded things that really mattered that should not have been disregarded.

That’s hurt, and I know where I was wrong. I’ve said it before I don’t see online meeting and communication as being real. I can’t take it seriously. You might as well be a bot. I can’t get past that hang up either. I’m old school and always will be. I won’t even online date or hookup. Never have, never will. ∆∆∆ that’s why. I know much, much better and more real.