I wish so dearly I hadn’t told my best friend I loved her. I took a what was once a wonderful, wonderful friendship and just… Ruined it, made it an okay friendship, one that you can have with anyone. I just was so f****** full of myself, I was certain she’d love me back like a dumbass. But best friends don’t stay up late into the night telling each other they believe the other to be a beautiful wonderful person. Best friends don’t tell each other they live each other… But when I clarified that it was romantic on my end I just ruined it. She told me thinking about it made her sick. She must find it disgusting… She deserves better than me anyway. I’m boring and tired and impulsive and can be selfish and she’s kind and considerate and clever and funny. I just want to be her friend again but now it’s all weird… I don’t even care if she doesn’t like me that way, I just wanna joke and hang out with her like we always have until I told her that I liked her.