Sick and tired of being a horrible person to others just to make myself feel better. I bounce between extremes – altruism, hedonism; from Dr. Jekyll to Ms. Hyde. It’s unfulfilling at the end of the day. Tired of caring about being liked by people or whatever, tired of being a d*** to people. Just want to avoid everyone, but I also want real meaningful friendships… So hard to have that these days. I don’t even have any close friends anymore. It’s all shallow, fake online friendships and acquaintances.