i’ve cheated on my boyfriend with my ex multiple times in the 8 months we’ve been together and they both have no clue ,don’t get me wrong i feel bad and i love my boyfriend but i also don’t feel bad and love my ex i feel like its deeper though our connection is so strong i’ve been through alot with him he knows me we lost our v cards to each other, my feelings have never gone away he was the first person i’ve ever been with we were together for two and a half years….we were teens when we broke up we were immature then but now its different we’ve always had contact every couple of months but prior to us breaking up he went ghost for a little to get himself figured out and his growth as well that’s when i got with my current boyfriend a couple months after me and my ex broke up, kind of something to get my mind off of the true pain but i ended up falling for him and enjoying the time spent but my ex always came around and i never really stopped thinking about him and now its serious my ex finally knows what he wants and is mature i’m so happy for him but i’m stuck in a situation because my current boyfriend helped distract me from the pain and i really had good experiences as well and special moments but ive also spend 2 and half years with someone who grew up with me who helped mold me into the person i am today and much much more, they both have something the other doesn’t, i’ve tried to break up with my current boyfriend but i never end up falling through with it and sometimes im at a loss idk if that makes me selfish or not i just don’t know what is right at the moment.