What do you mean checking up?

I have no clue and that’s the thing I’m not sure you think about. I literally have no idea what you have been doing for 29 years. You know what I have? I have seen 1 maybe 2 pictures on the internet, 13 years ago that have long been removed, and that about it, aside from a few sightings in town here that may or may not have been you.

My point with all that, is I ha e been forced for almost decades, let’s face it, you slowly cut any way I could possibly communicate with you at the start, I have had to get used to that for many years. Almost decades. And you can add to that plenty of the worst s*** you could ever imagine. Not really pleasant thoughts.

Eventually, a person gets over it and if it was bad enough, that mother fucker is tough as nails. And probably pretty pissed off about it too. Eventually though you just accept the circumstances and look at it from a realistic place. You realize we weren’t right for each other, and if you’re surviving a mental beatdown and healing, that kind of person (you) is not worth the energy. It’s hard to care when you had the s*** I had running through my mind. It kind of number you. Desensitizes you but a smart person comings ignore that will look at you and think “that b**** is f****** pure evil…” and really what did you give me, really? Realistically? You were completely ingenuine at all times. That’s what it felt like. You brought nothing into my life but a feeling of stress and anxiety. It brought out the worst in me too. It’s hard to care at this point. I really don’t care though. As long as it doesn’t touch me in any way, I don’t care what you’re doing or with who as long as it doesn’t involve me. You know I’ll never reach out to you. I might not even talk to you in person.

Also I like myself though too. I don’t even give a f*** what you say, you are never going to have another me. I know that. I’m a real prick too. If you ever think I talked to you since 2912, you’ve been catfished. I would never do that. There is no way I will ever talk to you on a personal level again. That’s a fact. I am done with that. That’s you BIG clue that I don’t care. I will never talk to you again.