Idk what to call it. Friends with benefits? An actual couple?

I’m 22, and I’ve never had a relationship before this. Especially not like this. We’re friends, we both have mutual feelings for each other, but I’m starting to doubt that… Idk what I’m looking for in a relationship.

I’ll admit, we’re both H**** AF. It started off with him comforting me by rubbing my hands bcuz I was crying over some stupid s***, and it escalated so fast within a week. I never thought in my life that I would ever experience this bcuz of how awkward I am with boys, but….. I ended up sucking his d*** yesterday. Yes, we did that with consent, so it’s fine.

But now I feel like he’s just been asking for nudes, and it’s kind of upsetting. My curiosity usually gets the better of me, but I haven’t sent him any nudes yet.

Am I just a plaything for him…? Does he see me as anything else besides fapping material? Sure, him playing with my b**** and sucking my n****** were such a turn on, but I want more than just s***** satisfaction in this relationship. I prefer the cute wholesome interactions anyway; the warm hugs, the forehead kisses, all that.

And we haven’t told any of our friends about this relationship too. It’s a super awkward situation. Idk how to go on about this. Yeah I just needed to let all of this out for a bit.