I once told one friend that I didn’t like another person that was kind of a friend and that I would prefer them to stay away from me but now that friend is a really good friend of mine that I absolutely love and I feel so said about what I said in the past and I hope she never finds out. I’m so glad I’m switching school and next year. It will be an interesting and stressing experience but I’m so ready to leave all the people I feel like I’ve hurt in some way. Sometimes I just look back on all the things I’ve done that were rude or mean in the slightest and I just want to isolate myself. I feel like I’ll keep hurting people if I don’t. Sometimes I feel like I have to watch my mouth because if I don’t something will slip out and then I’ll accidentally hurt someone else. I can’t stand the thought of it anymore. I feel like such a bad person. I probably am. Everyone says that I’m super nice but I just don’t believe that. I can’t. Not with all the things I’ve said. Not with all the small but horribly meaningful actions I’ve done. I just can’t deal with it anymore. I H A T E it. I feel wrong.
