I have suicidal thoughts almost every week. Homework, school, parents, normal teenage angst I guess. Whenever I feel happy and proud and my self esteem is actually high because of something someone said to me, my parents talk to me about how I shouldn’t get self esteem because of what someone else said. They call me horrible when I ask for something that I want to eat and make me apologize to them for “disrespecting” them. I’m just saying what I think. Its like communism for a child. Can’t I can’t think about anything? It’s mostly my mother, the one person who I used to have a deep connection with. When I was 8 years old she said, “You are not as polite as you were. What happened?? When you were 7 you were much better.” That was basically saying you’re dead to me when your 8. That’s when they started and they haven’t stopped. I’m having a great school life but I screw everything up. They expect so much of me and I’m in GT but can’t you accept that your daughters not as smart as you’d like!!? I bet you weren’t as good as you want me to Be! I’m not a puppet that has a perfect fairytale ending! No one does! Stop trying to make my life one! You are the reason I do not feel good about myself!! You are the reason I want to take my own life. Not even a counselor can help me now. You pushed me to my limit. I want to and somehow I know I will, kill myself. Then you’ll realize what you had. You should’ve been happy and content with what you had. Congratulations, you drove your child into a pit of despair and forgot about her. I hope you have a wonderful life with your imaginary fairytale goody two shoes child. She that needs you know is gone. She’s not here anymore at all. All you have is a teen who is going to teach you a lesson that will sting you and forever haunt you. Just like you did to me.