Today I snapped and almost killed myself. Ever since I remember I’ve had serious problems with making stuff on time, as if I had some sort of mental illness that kept me from managing my time properly. I’ve lost so many things to this issue.
Today I missed school for this, and after being several hours already dressed and almost ready to go, I also managed to be an hour late for having lunch with my boyfriend, he told me it wasn’t worth it for me to try to go, and I just lost it. I started crying and screaming, grabbed a belt and started beating myself… I seriously considered jumping out of the window and almost did.
I don’t know what to do, no therapy, strategy or resolution has actually helped so far, and the feeling of losing people and opportunities to this has become too overwhelming.
I hate myself.