After seven years this move across the country has killed us. She can’t keep her anxiety in check, couldn’t even hold a job for four days, and expects me to be happy about allowing her to live out her dream of pursuing make-up while I work at a job I have already had before that made me so depressed all I did was sleep when I wasn’t working. This was not the deal. I did not work s***** jobs for five years while she finished college so that I could again work a s***** job so she can find her dream career. I’ve put off college for her. I moved across the country to be with her. I drive her everywhere. I clean. I cook. I take care of the dogs. I make sure she’s eaten and taken her meds and what do I get in return for it? Well, I get to deal with her being upset for no reason whatsoever and when I try to help I’m being ‘flippant’. I’m sorry, but I wasn’t aware telling you that comparing your life to someone else’s isn’t healthy was going to result in you going to bed without saying a f****** word to me. I don’t know what she wants from me anymore. I don’t have anymore to give. I love her, but f***, I can’t do this anymore. All we do is fight and it’s just getting progressively worse. I have to walk on eggshells around her. I wake up with my own panic wondering what her mood is going to be today because it determines whether or not I have a good day or not. I’m so tired of the one expected to carry her through life. Not just by her, but by her entire family whom enables her behavior and when I’m not doing enough (i.e. not yet having a job because I was spending all of my time helping her through her anxiety s*** and driving her all over the f****** place so SHE could have a job) they tell her to leave me. This is like the third time in the last seven years and I just can’t take it anymore. I am NOT strong enough to handle my own s*** and hers and that’s what if feels like she expects. I can’t even have conversations about this with her because all I get is her pissed off and saying ‘k’. She’s got anxiety, I get that, but jesus f****** christ this is WAY beyond that. SHE DOESN’T EVEN CLEAN AND THEN HAS THE AUDACITY TO ASK ME IF I’M GOING TO CLEAN THE BEDROOM WHILE SHE’S GONE AFTER I JUST FOUND OUT MY F****** CAT DIED! This is not a partnership. This relationship is not equal, and I really wish she’d step the f*** up.
