I have never cut myself, until tonight. And in the same night, it hit me that I want to kill myself. Watching the blood rush down my arm made me feel some kind of surreal ecstasy and I just want to see more. My family life is torn into 1,000 pieces, I haven’t seen any of my best friends in forever, college has never felt like more of a waste of time, I find myself doing different drugs on several occasions,and my ex girlfriend couldn’t care less if I dropped dead. Why not f***** confess to the internet, right? Whatever. Probably don’t have the gut to off myself. Just wish things would’ve turned out differently I guess.