Married wife in love with another married man

I have been married with a man for over 22 years.In 2001 I had an affair with another married man, I fell hard for him.I loved him and the l********* was incredible.After a few months he went back to his wife and we stopped.In 2006, we hooked up again and this time he told me he loved me and even gave me a ring in Christmas time.He was seperated from his wife and our affair was incredible.I could not leave my husband, but I talked to this man alot and met him once a week for love sessions that were crazy.I did not know he was still trying to get back to his wife.Anyway, he went back to his wife, she found out and told EVERYONE! Including my husband, people at my work, everyone.Now my girls know too.My 21 year old daughter doesnt respect me anymore, but I have told her that her father was unattentive and the reason I was with this other man was becasuse I fell in love with him and I thought he loved me too.He is of course back with his wife, and treating her like a queen while my husband and daughters see me like a w****.I loved this man, he told me he loved me too.I am trying hard to make my marriage work, but I am so angry.I miss this other mans l********* and when my husband touches me I feel like crying because I can only think of this other man.Why did he lie to me?