I do not believe in god. I have nothing against him or the people who believe in him. I am fourteen and I have known I don’t believe and that I have to hid it since I was seven. my grandma is a high believer in Jesus and god and so is my friend and her family and if she ever told her parents I don’t believe in god then I wouldn’t be able to hang out with her anymore. Recently I suspected that my parents were catching on and they were acting different around me so I started to go to extra church things instead of just Sundays. the youth group I went to tonight said my name during prayer, thanking god for bringing me to them, I almost left the building right then. I stiffened noticeably and I bit my lip, they expect me to say prayer next week and I am panicking, I keep thinking about what I’m supposed to say and I am terrified that I will mess up and they will realize that I shouldn’t be in the church or worse they will try to ‘save’ me.