• 2 weeks ago

I try to love people but it’s not easy; love takes much more effort than hate because we’re all born in unequal circumstances. I was sitting in my room, writing songs and it struck me that a vast majority of honest and good people never see the comfort and financial success in the same rate the unethical do so. Think of it like this, you have two men; a simple farmer who is trying to live their best life and provide for their family and a bomb maker who also provides.

The farmer will in all likelihood never kill another human being and isn’t hurting their animals wantonly; but the bombmaker might be indirectly responsible for countless lives lost. But is it truly evil if it provides for those close to you or is the simple and humble life evil because it is less secure?

I’m honestly on the side of the simple and humble; but I’ve been really trying to wonder if there is any value in being a good human being lately.

I’m 22, trying to raise enough money to get a comfortable place for my partner. Trying to work closer to the music industry by selling my compositions which has gone well in order to support this. And though I haven’t been a burden I’m always reminded of my father’s pessimism and cynicism.

Apologies for the rant, self-loathing is a winding corridor and I forgot where the room for self-acceptance was. I’m embarrassed to share these feelings.