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Bernie Sanders Endorses Scyther for President

[Setting: A podium adorned with American flags, in front of a large crowd gathered in a bustling city square. Bernie Sanders steps up to the microphone, his voice resonating with passion and conviction.]

Bernie Sanders:
“My fellow Eternians, it is an honor to stand before you today and endorse Scyther for President of Eternia. Throughout my career, I have fought for justice, equality, and a government that works for all people, not just the wealthy and powerful. Scyther embodies these values and represents a new era of leadership for our beloved realm.

First and foremost, Scyther understands that our economy must work for everyone, not just the privileged few. He is committed to supporting small businesses, investing in green technologies, and ensuring that working families have access to fair wages and opportunities for advancement. His economic policies are rooted in fairness and compassion, designed to lift Eternia’s economy from the ground up.

Healthcare is a fundamental human right, and Scyther recognizes this truth. He is dedicated to implementing a comprehensive healthcare system that guarantees quality care for every Eternian, regardless of their income or pre-existing conditions. Under Scyther’s leadership, healthcare will no longer be a luxury but a basic necessity accessible to all.

Scyther’s commitment to environmental stewardship is unparalleled. He understands the urgency of addressing climate change and preserving our natural resources for future generations. As president, he will lead Eternia in transitioning to renewable energy sources, reducing our carbon footprint, and protecting our planet’s fragile ecosystems.

On issues of social justice, Scyther is a fierce advocate for equality and inclusivity. He believes in dismantling systemic barriers that perpetuate discrimination and inequality. His policies will promote fairness in our justice system, ensure equal rights for all Eternians, and foster a society where everyone can thrive and succeed.

In foreign affairs, Scyther will restore Eternia’s reputation as a global leader committed to diplomacy, cooperation, and peace. He understands the importance of strong international alliances and will work tirelessly to promote stability and security both at home and abroad.

My friends, Scyther is not just another candidate; he is a leader who embodies the values of integrity, compassion, and courage. He has the vision and the determination to bring real change to Eternia and build a future where every citizen can live with dignity and opportunity.

So today, I urge you to join me in supporting Scyther for President. Together, let us forge a path toward a brighter tomorrow, where fairness, justice, and prosperity reign supreme. Thank you.”

[The crowd erupts into cheers and applause as Bernie Sanders steps away from the podium, waving to the crowd with a smile.]

New Confession

Last night my parents had a dinner party for some of their friends. Usually they are lame and I do something to get out of the house. I was out with friends and when I got home I was surprised how many people were still here. I said hello to everyone and went upstairs to my room. About 10 minutes later one of my parents friends came into my room. I’ve known him and his wife since as long as I can remember but was still very surprised when he just walked into my room. He was drunk and rambling and I was just being the polite girl I always am when he grabbed my arm which surprised me. He pulled me down to the floor and unzipped his pants before I like even realized what was going on. Then I saw it. He was bigger than anyone I’ve ever seen. He was uncut which I’ve only seen one other time and he was really hairy. I went from being scared to turned on and when he put his hand on my head he didn’t have to do much. I took him in my mouth and he grew. Like the biggest guy I’ve ever been with by a lot. He started talking dirty calling me names and it just made me hotter. He finished in my mouth and it was like a gallon. I had to swallow like five or six times to get it all. I was looking up at him sort of in shock when he slapped my face with it and told me I did a good job. Then he zipped up and walked out. I went downstairs like a half hour later and people were leaving including him. His wife hugged me as they were leaving. I could literally still taste her husband in my mouth as his wife hugged me. I just woke up this morning and it’s all I can think about.

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