I’m really worried about my dog. I know animals don’t live forever, I know she’s old, but she’s been my first and only pet. Losing her is going to hurt so much I can hardly breathe just thinking about it.

She was there when my friends weren’t. Even though she’s been a huge pain and caused a lot of damage in her puppy years, she’s calmed down a lot as she’s aged and I love her so much. I know I haven’t been the best pet owner ever, but I’m really attached to her and I hope she knows how much I care about her.

I know most people would just say get another dog, but it just won’t be the same. No matter how this goes, I’m going to be blaming myself the entire time and spend a lot of time wondering how I could have done things differently to help her have a longer and happier life.

I don’t know that I’m ever going to want to own another animal ever again; I didn’t cry for my relatives funerals….but as it is, I’m already sobbing myself sick over just the thought that she’s not going to be in my life for much longer.

I don’t want anyone’s pity or sympathy or empathy…I just needed to let this out so I can try to feel a little less awful. And no, I don’t care who sees it as stupid to cry over an animal. This dog has been there for me when my family and friends haven’t been, so yes…I will cry for her.