I’m so confused. My side guy and I treat each other like side pieces and we are well aware that we are each others side piece – Now we’ve been f****** for over a year and my side guy knows I’m starting to think about kids with my main guy. He brought it up out of nowhere today and said he’s offended. and that he wouldn’t pressure me to do that. After all this time it’s still hard for me to read him. We spend 15-30 mins together maybe 1hr and a half max so it’s not like I’m feeling extreme efforts from him to be with me. I still pay for my own meals with him and occasionally I’ll spoil him by buying his meals or surprising him with gifts here and there. He doesn’t do that for me and no, I don’t expect anything in return, I do it because it makes me happy. I like getting things for others when I know they like/want it and gradually I’ve learned to distinguish those who deserve it and those who don’t. . . Normally this guy wouldn’t deserve it. BUT I value his view point and opinions which is why I’ve kept him around. I view this companionship as a long term boyfriend whom I can love hate and use. I imagine he also views me as a long term side booty. But when he starts asking how long I’ve been with my guy, asks why I’m still with my main guy, insists that he wouldn’t pressure me for a baby, says that we should get a trap house together to make it easier to see each other,, I start wondering how he views this relationship of ours. What does he hope to get out of this? I remember he was excited about ‘stealing me’ in the beginning and at that time I was happy with it, I let him say that. But he never pursued, he didn’t stick around long enough, he never paid for me, I feel like he just didn’t follow through… but were both in another relationship, and maybe it’s partially my fault for not letting him come see me. I’m just confused. I try to get into his head to see what he’s thinking but, he’s tough to talk deeply to – I feel like he’s hiding something or putting on a front. . . why would he be offended.
