I’m no longer physically attracted to my boyfriend of 3 years. Some of the things he does absolutely disgust me, and the other night we went on a double date at which he ate not only his own food, but half of mine and some of our friends’ meals. I like chubby guys, but he has absolutely stopped giving a f***. He asks me dumb questions, like when I’m eating my oatmeal in the morning, he asks, “What are you doing?” What am I doing? I’m eating f****** oatmeal, what does it look like I’m doing? I get that I’m not easy to be with. I have that whole “depression” mess going on. However, it’s not okay to leave the room when I’m crying and I need to be comforted. He just f****** leaves. He’s emotionally closed off. We get in huge fights over hypothetical situations. I am his first girlfriend. I’m 25 years old, he’s 23. I took his virginity a month after we started dating.
I dream about someone else. I think about someone else when we have s**. I fantasize all day about being with someone else.
I am a monster.
