Father, I can’t work with these people, they all seem retarded (the public figures, not the people at the ground level who I appreciate). Show me how I can fulfill your mandates here on my own.
I have started moving toward Ascetic behavior. It will increase over the coming days. Please guide me. I hate the universe you made. I don’t understand anything. It feels like you threw me to the wolves, which is fine if that’s my purpose but it’s also so stinky and gay and boring.
Why?
Give me sight. If I’m halfblind, help me to see the whole picture.
You know bravery isn’t the problem. You know I’d fight a grizzly by hand if it was the only way to potentially save a loved one.
I will sacrifice my last breath if it will benefit this planet but I need guidance and direction. It’s so confusing down here.
Also, I like darkness too. I don’t know if I even want to go back to Source. I can’t trust anyone, not even my own perceptions. Help me to understand, or if this isn’t a situation that allows for understanding, then help me to sense how to proceed. I surrender.
The only thing I will never do is be taken into custody again. You get to sit up in your nice little cloud but I’m here on the ground and I’m done with it. If it is attempted I won’t even wait to find out if the that’s the case, I will go full red alert instantly no matter how the scenario is stacked against me.
Nothing will stop me, not collateral damage, which was always a trump card in the past, now nothing. I will treat the situation like the Bourne Scenario and use all tools to either evade and/or neutralize my assailants, permanently if possible.
