12 years
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Where do I even start? Sometimes I feel like I’m talking but all everyone is hearing is ‘blah blah blah blah blah’. Yes, people ‘listen’ to me, but no one actually pays attention to what I’m saying and then 6 months later they say ‘man I wish someone had told me (something that I told them 6 months ago) before I went and did ____.’ or ‘we need to focus more if we ever want to get anything done (exactly like I’ve been saying from the get-go). Sometimes I feel like I’m walking into the wind on a cold winter day and everyone’s just rushing past me in the other direction, slapping me in the face as they pass by. It’s kind of annoying, y’know? I think I’m pretty much done trying to help other people because none of the people around me want my help. (although they’ll probably miss it after I stop offering it…)

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I f****** hate you (bf) , you f****** manipulative,hypocrite, emotionally abusive, vaping, life draining, wannabe player b******. I.HATE YOU. I still deeply resent you. This is why everyone thinks you’re an a****** at your job. You’re not some anti-hero that you claimed to be. No- You’re just an a******. Point blank . Especially to me of all people! You always take it out on me, and you still wonder why I won’t touch you like that or shut down completely with you. Everytime you sense or feel even an inch that im happy, peaceful, something I enjoy doing you immediately smash that down so you can feel better and have power over me. What’s funny is that every time you’re in the wrong, overstep your boundaries, make me really upset or talk crap to me – karma smacks you right in the face everytime & you don’t even realize it. Funny how you’ve said yourself that people spit at the sky just for it to come back-yet you’ve done the exact same thing too – you’re not godlike or safe from getting karma, even I’ve dealt with karma too when I was in the wrong many times too. So no- you’re not a misunderstood dark knight turn bad like the joker you claim to be. You’re just an egotistical bigoted jerk & everyone can see that except you. I hate myself that I fell for your facade – lovebomb trap years ago . And all the times that you’ve talked crap about other’s appearances, especially women’s, karma yet again smacked you in the face & put on a ton of weight and still wonder why you haven’t lost pounds but still continue on demanding me to cook & make you even more food despite you complaining about it , hmmmm , gee I wonder why. Anyways , glad to vent that out .