idk what to/how to categorize this. This is basic a vent post. !TW! mentions unaliving feelings, getting outed ,absent parents (kinda),bullying,fat shaming. i think i’m having another relapse, it’s worse than before everything was going well until it just stopped going well. I feel so mentally drained. I feel so tired,I feel like I don’t have any energy to do any of the things I like anymore. Everything I used to like is boring now. I’m starting to feel dead inside. I know it’s corny but I’m just tired. I had a rough childhood. It started affecting me more than ever. My parents divorced when I was 5. My parents were never really there for me as a kid. Mostly my father, he was always busy with work. My mother was too but she at least was kinda there for me. They know I’m having these feelings but they never really helped. They never were there for me when I needed them though. I needed them and they just ignored me.Even when my grandma would fat shame me. They never did anything. They promised they would talk to her .They never did. I don’t know how to feel anymore. I feel like I’m in someone else’s body. I feel like I have been living a lie my whole life. I feel like my whole life is a lie. I have been misgendered so much. Even by some of my really close friends. One of them even outed me to my whole class many times. She always misgenders me. I feel like no one cares anymore. I don’t know who to talk to anymore. People make fun of me. They call me weird and laugh at me just for talking to my friends. I feel like everyone is looking at me in a bad way. I feel like everyone is judging me. I feel like everyone hates me .I feel like killing myself. I’m just so tired. I feel like there is no hope for me. I feel like there’s no reason to live anymore. I’m sorry if you had to read this. I’m so sorry. I just had to get this off my chest