i suffer for sub-clinical anorexia. i don’t care nor do i want to do anything about it (because i want to be thinner obviously)

i’m confused 90% of the time, which gets in the way of my happiness. ignorance is bliss, but there’s just so many jamming thoughts in my brain i can’t even say what i’m thinking, because i don’t actually know. i’m just confused about everything, my life choices, etc.

i miss my mom a lot. i feel guilty about leaving her behind to go to art college.

i also hate myself quite a lot, like, i hear myself talking to other people and after that moment of processing what i just said i feel a sudden hatred towards myself, sort of like ‘shut the f*** up, you’re not special nor worth any attention’ i dunno. i guess all in all i have seriously low self-esteem.

but i’m doing well in college and i guess that’s the most important thing