i’ve been emailing a kids help counsellor for about 5 months now, and she says i should really seek help because my depression is getting really bad, even though my parents are yet to notice, heck my whole family. just under a month ago i tried to kill myself but i just couldn’t cut deep enough, so i’ve been thinking about catching a bus to a hospital and admitting myself, but then i just think about all the things coming up this year that my parents have paid lots of money for and i dont want to let them down…not again. should i do it anyway, or should i just slit my wrists and lie on my floor so someone will walk in my room and see then call the ambulance, so i dont have to check myself in or should i tell my mum i’m sick so she can get me a doctors appointment and then actually tell the doctor what i’ve been going through? i realise telling someone would be a lot easier, but no matter how hard i try i cant force the words out of my mouth. i dont really want to tell my family because they’re partly why i feel the way i do, and i’d rather not have to tell them that. i’m just so confused, i need help but i cant bring myself to get it.