I have depression I have fantasies of a girl I feel trapped I am a girl I want to be a boy so bad I feel sad whenever I think of that. I've selfharmed for

6 years

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I have depression I have fantasies of a girl I feel trapped I am a girl I want to be a boy so bad I feel sad whenever I think of that. I’ve selfharmed for her it sorta creeps me out I’ve seen gore at 10 and p*** at 9 I still do I hate my parents they wont support me. my dad at sometimes is racist my dad has anger issues my mom cant stop insulting me the fact she knows I have depression. I haven’t attempted to commit suicide out of fear and because whenever I see that girl she makes me smile makes me feel flustered at sometimes but since I love her insanely I’ve grown habits of hitting or damaging my head whenever I get flustered of thinking of her naked or when I get excited . It s**** to be in this position it really does.

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