I hate when I’m so nice to people but they wanna be rude to me like f*** you then
I love the feeling of being scared. Being scared and being ashamed are different. The feeling is different and omg being horrified that is the s***. Knowing what’s going to happen and not being able to do anything about it that is the total bomb. Expecially when it’s a defamation or degration in front of peers or those younger witnessing as you cower your way through it knowing they’re going to be staring at you.
I repent for blasphemy against holy spirit disbelieving somethings in bible sry but im still struggling with some things but i beilueve he exists anx mlst the bible. I still think some things are not great advice or many parts are contradictory. I believe jesus exists does for ours sins & the Trinidadian thing etc etc it’s just a couple small things in bible that I get stuck on I also disbelieve he can hear me pray. It’s not bc I don’t believe he hears anyone’s prayers or bc satan is whispering lies telling me Jesus can’t hear me etc it’s just feels like I’ve been praying on my knees for long time and many things never got better in 2 years I actually feel worse in life and faith then i did 2 years ago. But I do read the bible more/bible studies. Can’t get myself to pray very much these days. I used to pray 2 to 3 times a day now I just feel like.. just nothingness when I pray been like that for like a year
