I want to punch something all the time. I have no friends. I’m embarrassing. I don’t want to do this anymore. I want a car to run me over and kill me because I read somewhere that if you kill yourself you won’t be able to go to heaven with God. I would run in front of one but I’m pretty sure that would be considered as suicide. I’m stupid. No one likes me. Why don’t people like me? Am I too much? Is it because I’m ugly? I just want to be loved. It seems like everyday I’m thinking of what not to do because I could mess everything up. I should be ashamed for being me. I don’t want to be here anymore. I want to cut myself so bad but I promised my sister I wouldn’t a long time ago when I didn’t feel like this. I’m so over dramatic. I need to stop. I’m an attention seeker. I don’t know what I’m taking about. Uhhhhhhhhh I’m so frickin ungrateful. I just don’t want to be alone anymore. I want to scream. I wanna kill myself. I wanna kill myself. Please. I want to go to heaven. Please. Please take me there. Then I can see God. I pray every year for him to take me to heaven. I try my best to be a good person or friend but nothing I do is right. I’m a s***. I try not to be but mom said she is going to throw my clothes away. I don’t think mom likes me. Also I don’t think my sister or my other sister or my other sister or my brother or my dad or people or anyone like me. I should just kill myself then people will be happy. Will I still go to heaven if people are happy when I kill myself? They would be so happy. Please. Please. Please. Please. Please. Please. Pleaseeeeee. Pleaseeeeeeeee. No one cares. It’s not like I matter. Uhhh I’m so stupid to think I did. How do I die without killing myself? Please. I just want to be happy. Dang I remember when I was little I didn’t care about anything. I was happy. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being a thot and a s*** and a hoe and not shutting up and not being brave enough to kill myself already. Uggggghhhh I sound overdramatic. I hope people will at least remember me when I die. I’m sorry for not being enough mom. I tried hard especially for you. I’m sorry. Hurts. Heart. Kill. Please. I’m sorry.
