met greg yesterday. we sat in central park and chatted for over one hour. he is apparently still living with a lover with whom he has had no s** in six years. the issue with greg is that he is looking for something more than just a stable side arrangement to take care of his s***** desires. he is even looking for more than an additional friendship punctuated by activities like going to the gym and some display of emotion. he wants a full relation of a monogamous nature that excludes everybody else except himself and another man. in fact he even asked me why i choose to remain in my relation and suggested that we both embrace on a relation to the exclusion of all the other relations. my relation with ed is quite valuable and unlike a mixed orientation marriage of the type mrk and cth have, i am very positively moved by my partner’s appearance and ways. I dont say things like: “she (cth) is physically repulsive, but i have to act lovy dovy to keep things running smooth these days…”, mrk 2013.

ed and i returned home from the gym at close to 8pm and had a bottle of wine on the terrace. we discussed greg and the fact that two helicopters hovering over central park were texting him as we sat there talking. amazingly enough we shared many areas of interest. he too is involved in renovating several houses and enjoys diy projects. he even attended a school that was my first choice when i graduated from hs.

indeed it was an interesting evening. i provided him with an account of my relation with mrk and how he had decided that our relation should be put on hold in an attempt to calm his delusional straight wife. i told him that cth to this day fails to accept fully the fact that her husband is a homosexual that need to express his homosexuality. he laughed when i quote mrk claiming that “he had been taking care of his needs and not cth” in reference to the fact that he had been having s** for about 5 years with a guy every other week. greg responded by saying without being cued something to the effect that mrk was self-hating. then he went on to say “i too dated women for over 10 years in attempt to cover-up my gayness”, but at the end i realized that this was not right because i was only hurting them and myself. “sure i loved them. i loved them like the way i love my pet dog, not the way i can love and have loved a man”, greg. “when i was involved in those type of relations, i was taking care of the needs of society and my relatives, not my needs. it was difficult walking away from those relation and embracing who i was with all its consequences”, greg.

at the end i terminated our meeting as i had to meet ed at the gym. ed asked many questions about greg. in all it was a happy meeting. i could sense that greg was disappointed that i was not willing to even consider breaking up my relation to pursue a relation with just one male. at one point he grew very sad when i mentioned how difficult it was to find the right man out there. “yes, i know. but i try to maintain a positive outlook”, greg. when we bid goodbye and parted, i turned back to see him walk away.

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