Lately, I just received a bunch of retweets on twitter abt the death of a korean idol. Well tbh… I’m his fan. I watched tons of his videos a lot of time and suddenly, he’s dead. He didn’t die in an accident or murder or anything. He died bcos of an apparent suicide. I never once thought he would do that. They said he had depression. But, I always saw him smiling in the videos I watched and even in variety shows, he jokes a lot. It looked as if he owns all the happiness in the world. Would it be a lie? If it was, then… he really is good at acting and hiding his pain all by himself. Leaving the whole nation felt guilty towards his death. I stiil don’t believe it.

But, I’ve learned sth from his sudden suicide death.

My friends. My family. The person I love.
They are all living people who has feelings. I love them. If it’s not me, who else is going to wipe of their tears when they’re feeling down and be by their side forever?

I realised that, I have to stop thinking of my own problems. There’s many other people who has much bigger problem than I do. So, I need to get up and fight. Not alone. I’m going to fight together with my loved ones. Facing all our problems together. Support one another. Feel loved.

That’s how I’m going to live from now on. I need to be strong for their sake bcos if not… someone might end up like him.

Depression. Suicide.

I know. Some people must’ve been through a lot and gave up without trying a little bit more. So, I’m going to say this…

“Hold on just a little bit more. There’s still a lot of time for you to wait. Just… hold on to it. It gets better overtime. There will be your time when you can breath the air peacefully without feeling any guilt. Every morning when you wake up, set your mind, ‘Today I will continue to live to stand to breath every single thing altho it’ll destroy me in the inside cause I belive that one day, my time will come. And, I’ll live happily like I always wish with a very clear and peaceful mind. All I need to do is wait and hold on to it.”

I’m not confessing this as a kpop fan but, as a human who still cares for others and wish them to live happily.

I took this as a lesson and as a reason to why I should keep living and love people around me.

That’s all. Thank you.