my half sister travels between Chicago and here every 2 weeks to take care of her dad who’s dying from cancer and to come visit me while our oldest sister takes her place. our oldest sister lives with her boyfriend in a different state so I don’t get to see her. For two weeks I’m alone and it’s always been stressful because our mom has always been abusive and now I can’t run to my older sisters anymore to catch a break. my sister who comes back here is my best friend and we were going to see a concert together on the 21st but an emergency is happening and her dad might actually pass. I know i shouldn’t be upset because she has to leave early, but I am. I feel guilty about being sad over the fact that I can’t go to the concert with her and do something special, I feel sad that im going to be stuck here alone with my mom for who knows how long, I’m alone and I feel so guilty for being upset. why does everything have to happen so randomly, so suddenly. Why does everyone have to leave. I’m so tired of being here these days. It hurts and I feel selfish and disgusted with myself. Im tired