Last week, some family friends I hadn’t seen in ten years came across the country for a visit and I had the chance to catch up with them over the course of several evenings. I’m in my mid-30s, they’re in their early 50s and have a daughter in middle school as well as a son who just finished kindergarten. I’ve known the couple since I was a teenager when the husband was one of my high school teachers and the wife sang in the church choir with my mom. My parents are their daughter’s godparents, so lots of connections and they’re very good friends.

I’m pretty good with kids, especially for a single guy (the perks of being part of a huge family) and so in addition to catching up with the couple, I spent some time with the kids too, talking about their activities, books, letting them show me their favorite apps, etc. I became one of their son’s favorite people and apparently he kept asking if they were going to see me again and suggested they bring me back to their home with them. When we were playing board games one of the nights, their daughter asked if I could help her and play on as team with her, which I accepted.

During the game, she began acting in a way that I wasn’t entirely sure how to handle. She’d follow me into the kitchen when I got up from the game and pretty much clung to my side the whole evening, she requested that we plan our next moves in the game via text message so other teams couldn’t overhear. She doesn’t even have a phone (parents are pretty strict), so she borrowed her mom’s phone and added me as a contact, even though I’m positive I was already in there and made sure it was really thoroughly done. Full name, carefully spelled correctly, phone number, address, email, birthday, etc.

She’s a very sweet kid and I figured it was at most an innocent crush, so I just went along with everything. I certainly had my share of inappropriate crushes when I was her age and I was always elated when I received attention from them, so I continued to be very nice and attentive to her. Later in the evening, she asked if she could show me a card game she really liked and I agreed and the two of us ended up sitting on the floor and playing one of those types of games where cards are laid out everywhere on the floor and you’re constantly adding to piles and stealing them from each other. It’s summer and she was wearing a skirt and halfway through our game I’m looking at some of the cards right in front of her and because of how she’s sitting, I can see all the way up her skirt. I paused for a second and tried to figure out if it would be more embarrassing for her/me to say something so she could cover up a little better or if I should just ignore it. I decide to just ignore it and I look up at her face while I figure out where my eyes need to be to conclude this game. Something about the look on her face gave me the feeling that she was very much aware of what had just happened and almost immediately she smiled and shifted positions to one that exposed even more. At that point, I felt compelled to say something and suggested she sit differently under the guise that her legs might come into contact with the cards where they were.

The night ended without any further incident, but on the day they were flying home, I began receiving texts from the daughter at the airport. She was nervous about flying and had had some discomfort in her ears from the air pressure on the way here. I recommended chewing gum would help with the air pressure and tried to reassure that flying was super safe. Just your usual nervous flyer stuff. But the texts have continued since they arrived home. She borrows her mom’s phone to say hi to me most days and last night, it took a turn that has left me baffled at what to do now.

I hadn’t been paying attention to my phone, but later in the evening when I finally did, I found that my phone was blown up with text messages from her. Over time, the messages changed from hi to telling me she was bored to asking what I was doing to why I wasn’t replying to saying she really wanted to text her back before finally reaching several graphic pictures in what I can only assume was an attempt to get my attention. She even asked if I liked the underwear she was wearing in one picture better than the pair she had had on during our awkward card game. And now I don’t have a clue what I’m supposed to do.

I’m obviously not interested, but I feel like if I tell her parents that I’ve been sent these super inappropriate pictures that the uncomfortableness of the situation will strain our friendship or anger them enough to think I’ve done something to encourage the behavior from her. I’m leaning towards just telling them because as embarrassed as I am to say something, I feel like it would be even worse if they discover what she’s been up to on their own. The other part of the problem is that I’m concerned about where this inappropriate s***** behavior is coming from and part of me is worried that it’s the result of some sort of abuse she might have suffered. I know that I was extremely s******* curious around her age and I was never abused, although I was also quite a bit more timid about it. So I guess the questions I’m looking for help with are 1) should I say something to the parents? and 2) is this within the bounds (albeit a very far edge of it) of normal behavior for a girl that age?