So my best friend and I have been best friends for 3 and a half years now. She goes to a different school now and she lives in a different state, so we

12 years

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So my best friend and I have been best friends for 3 and a half years now. She goes to a different school now and she lives in a different state, so we never see each other. We always go on phone calls and stuff, but lately I’ve been questioning our friendship. I had self harmed and I told her I stopped and a couple of months after she confessed into saying that she really thought I had no reason to self harm and my life was “fantastic”, she pointed out all the problems I told her and said that they weren’t that big of a deal. I was really upset with her but didn’t show it. Today I sent her something someone said online about self harm that was painfully stupid. She thought I said it. I said “What kind of person do you take me for?” she laughed and said “Well most of the time you’re mislead” and I was like “How?” she said “Two years ago you asked me if period blood was sperm.” I have no memory of this, she says I have said plenty of stupid stuff like this before but I never remember saying this or anything like that, I have never been that stupid but anyway, I’m pretty sure I know a lot more about self harm then she does because I actually did self harm but I gave up on telling her because she would probably say she knew more because her parents are studying psychology.

Anyway, she always says “I love the way I look” or “I love my body” when she knows I have self-esteem issues. She has always been prettier and better then me and I always feel belittled by her because she will say stuff like “I’m s***, you’re cute” which makes me feel really small and even worse about my body. She will always point out my flat chest that I feel bad about because I already get picked on about it. She never admits she is wrong and she obviously thinks she is smarter then me.

One time I had a crush on a boy and I thought he had a crush on me and then said to her he actually liked her. She turned him down and at the time she didn’t know I had a crush on him so I just faked a smile when she told me laughing along, years later I told her because I didn’t have a crush on him anymore. She always repeats the story even though she knows it hurts me.

Despite all of this, we still have really good talks, I really like her and we even plan on having a gap-year together and sharing apartments and stuff. Months ago I got sick of her saying stuff and said we should stop being best friends she refused and I eventually dropped it.

Should I remain to be best friends with her or should I just drop the friendship, if so, how?

New Confession

I remember we were both 16 I believe or she was older. No, she was a senior in high school and I was a sophomore. I knew her because we talked most of his time but at the same time I remember months later, she walked me down the steps and broad daylight in our apartment and that’s the first time I got my s** experience for my girl and I remember she was bending down I saw her with no p****** and I remember she got down after she bend over I said please get up and I said what are you gonna show me and she got done she put on my pants and she said you’re hairy and I said I know I am I forgot to shave and s***. I got hard and she said you have a huge c*** and I said I know I do I said I did them with it not that much and she started sucking it and giving me a h******* and it was nice. I don’t know if I peed or I come I don’t remember, but that’s when her little brother caught us and I said oh s*** we’re in trouble dude and I said please get up and her mom was there too like damn we’re fucked and we went to go back to the apartment and I’m like damn pain of shame and I’m was about to slapper and the siblings and her brother was there and I said kids go to the kitchen or go upstairs please dude I don’t know man go to the kitchen or go upstairs please dude thank you and the mom said listen to me while I’m talking to you and I said ma’am, you don’t have to your daughter and she was about you and I defend her and I’m saying ma’am don’t hit your daughter please and she said oh and I said no we’re not in love or anything it would just have fresh experience that’s all but I never only texted her once I said do you hey do you remember the black cat in our apartment and that’s it and she texted back saying what do you mean and I said do you know the cat and and no, and we just talked after that, but we didn’t do anything. Nothing like that then she said call my mom and I said I don’t know where she live and she said yeah you do and I called my mom and my mom was about to hit me. She got mad and s*** and I said mom don’t hit me. Hey don’t hit me please what’s wrong with you? We’re teenagers for once and we got caught and this is public disobedience I understand we probably traumatized that child but what I’m saying is it so forget what happened today and never speak of it again

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Beautiful starlet at the end of the day.