I have lived my life knowing I cannot do everything I want because I know that's life and now I dont know if I know how to live. It feels like I am

12 years

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I have lived my life knowing I cannot do everything I want because I know that’s life and now I dont know if I know how to live. It feels like I am trapped inside my mind because as soon as my thoughts leave my mouth they dont feel real. They make me feel fake.

I know I cant get all the tattoos I would like
I know I cant have wild coloured hair
I know cant dress the way I want
Or act the way I want

Because we dont live in a perfect world where its ok to be completely ourselves all the time. I have to think of job prospects, my future and while I may love to not care what others think of me, I do.

I want nothing more than to be invisible. I want to be able to walk down the street and not think everyone is judging or laughing at me. I want to be free to wear the clothes I like and not stare at the ground as I walk.

I want to be free and I dont know how to.

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