I love my family so much. But they make me so angry I could spit blood. They know he raped me for 3 years but they still let him in the house and treat him with total love and affection. And expect me to do the same. He can tell me not to speak because I’m ‘talking over him’ and no one says a word in my defence or even tries to reintegrate me into the conversation. You all failed to protect me from him when I was too small to protect myself and now you all refuse to say a word in my defense. I don’t know why I still have anything to do with any of them. But I still love the whole bunch of them absolutely. I can’t reconcile the two warring emotions and I just don’t know what to do anymore.