I have been posting about ongoing oral servicing of nekghborhood married men and ongoing physical relationship with ex wife and how my ex has now birefly witnessed me on my knees for the neighborhood married men. But this is no longer about relaying the s**. I am utterly confused about how my ex has been reacting to what she saw. She has a key to my house and came over unannounced in the wee hours of last night/thos morning. I am usually a light sleeper but mostly because of the intensity and amount of s** with her i have been mentally and physically drained so am sleeping heavier. I woke to her slipping naked into my bed behind me. I did not even have time to be startled because i recognzed her low voice and scent. She slid up against my back as i had been sleeping on my side and her hand reached around my torso. She was softly talking and stroking my body and my arousal was immediate. When her hand strayed down she chuckled when she found me erect then began to slowly m********* me as she repeated the lurid things she wants to do now to join in on what she saw when she saw me on my knees for the man. Slowly she spoke it all again as she teased me verbally and pbysically. I could barely breathe when she coaxed the o***** out of me. She allowed me to catch my breath before pulling me out of bed and out the back door to my back yard. Despite all my knowledge of her across the years the fact that she so casually and confidently stepped out the door naked with me in tow was itself as unsettling as what she has said about being part of my s** with the neighborhood married men. But she led us into the moonlight across the deck and down the steps across the grass to my shed where i kneel for those men we went. As soon as we were in the shed she kneeled and looked up at me and said it was my turn, and this woman who had always disliked giving me oral proceeded to wreck my mind with worshipful passion. I have never been big on receiving oral i usually prefer to give it. But somehow she managed to take me there and keep me from collapsing on my own knees from the long slow burn of what she did to me. And she was still not done with me….or perhaps not done for her own wishes. When i could walk steadily she led me out into the grass and guided me down on all fours until i was head down a** up in the wet grass. She knows i have beem curious about a*** on my own body but never explored it except on my own. I was gasping as she spread my cheeks and i groaned when i felt her lips and tongue on my backside. Soon she had het grip around the bsse of my g******* as she slipped finger after finger into me using her own wetness as a lubricant. It felt like hours until i loudly moaned thru what orgasmic ability i still had left in me as she coaxed me to spill what little s**** i still had on her hand and the grass under me. She moved to my head and lifted my chin so that i could clean her hand before leaning in to kiss me and taste me in my mouth. Next thing you know i am on my back with her soaking my face as she straddled my mouth grinding and taking what she wanted without holding herself back from her own loud moans. Anyone who would have beem walking the sidewalk on the other side of the privacy fence would have clearly heard. When she had her fill of riding my mouth, she lay alongside me. I was wrecked emotionally and physically. After all the recent activity and her taking me to o***** by hand in bed and by mouth in the shed i was exhausted. But as she fondled me gently even i could feel the weak pulse of blood trying to bring me back to life. She seemed to not want to take no as my body’s answer and turned around over me to be on top of the 69 she put us into. She has always known how orally insatiable i am and mostly used her mouth on my nalls as her hand firmly coaxed me. It was the most beautiful part of the night to be looking up at her in the moonlight as she eventually succeeded and ended up straddlig my hips as she rode me and i felt i was looking up at either a goddess or a succubus. I had no chance of another climax but savored her taking from my body what she wanted and i ended up slipping my hand under her very plump belly on top of me so that my fingers helped her takr her pleasures from me. Eventually she had what she had wanted and rose off me. She told me she liked the idea of leaving me wrecked in the grass but she had already taken the day off and told me i was going to as well. She suggested we shower since we were covered in wet grass but shr stopped us at the hose by my deck and turned it on me. She laughed as i yelped with the cold water but was relentless, even insisting o turn and spread my cheeks and finally telling me to grip and hold out my g******* until they shrank and retracted completely. She handed me the spray nozzle and did not seem to mind the cold water at all, even lifting and holdimg ber breasts up and luridly tilting ber hips forward to spread herself open as she directed me to keep the spray aimed. Then in and upstairs to my bed as she held me as i still shivered as i warmed back up. And still not satisfied she had me sit up in bed as she lay leaning back into me and masturbated as yet more filth czme from her mouth. As she reocivered i got my instructioms….to decide what man we would pleasute together in the shed. To tell me she was going to get a s t r a p o n to train me to eventually be fucked by one of them. We both dozed lightly but by dawn she was ready to leave. She walked to the door to the driveway naked and i rrealized i had not seen her clothing. She laughed and told me her dress was in her car because she had driven to my house in the dark naked and had even before she came to my bed had stepped out of her car naked to enter the back yard to maturbate in the shed first. She laughed at my wide eyed shock. She said she had c** hard m*********** in the shed remembering her view if me on my knees for a man. But that she would have preferred the shed still reek of s** and s****. As the dawn got brighter she told me to not forget my instructions and walked out naked to her car. I can only assume she put her dress on first. I am unable to process any of this….why is she now like this? During our marriagr or after divorcr she was never like this. I feel like something is wrong or their is a motive or a trap in all this. I want the simpler calmer FWB our post divorce s** had been. No small part of me wants this over and back to the fucked up insane “normal” it used to be no matter how she wants to explorre and push boundaries. And i am honestly a little afraid to try to explain my fears to her.

I’m writing this here because it’s the only way to communicate with you.

July 22, 2017. Lourdes, France. A candle was lit to honor all the MPSJ students who passed away with a prayer to the Virgin Mary to comfort their parents. This post was seen by the best friend of Laurie’s late sister, Sue Jasenec, and it inspired her to reach out to Laurie’s mother and comfort her. Susan Jasenec’s best friend was inspired to comfort Mrs. Jasenec because of my candle. May this be my reparation to your family. Please accept it. I need closure.