I feel so much like s***. I wish I never dated them because it makes me so unbelievably ill. I’m so emotionally drained and I don’t think I’ll ever be okay. I have no safe place. Today I hung out with my ex, we’re still friends, but we went thrifting and then went to their house. We kissed because I started crying about how much I missed being with them (we broke up November 8 2022) and they just felt so f****** bad for me. We had s**. I wish I never meant them or initated any communication I’ve ever had with them. They make me wanna do things to myself. I’ve been in therapy for years and have a horrible home life. School f****** drains the s*** out of me. I shut everyone out to be with them. I wish it worked every time I tried to do it.