• 2 weeks ago

I truly believe therapists are a complete waste of time and money. You really should need a therapist to sort through your shit and tell you what going on. If you feel you need to I honestly believe you are dumb, weak, or both. I truly believe that. Maybe if you were a kid who doesn’t know anything really, but a grown adult…. I don’t know. I am smart enough to look at a situation, no matter how big or small it is and see everything for what it is, including where my blame towards myself lies, my mistakes, wherever and the obvious causes and solutions to my problems. I have sat there for 12 hours shots for months at times, building plastic models, intricate models, build paint detail, 12+ hours, all night. b
Building models, taking breaks, look at shit in the sky through my telescope, I still have the pictures I took doing it, a new it wasn’t just building and observing, It was thinking. I am a certain type of person. You could say I’m boring. I always have been. I don’t want to fight, argue, I don’t want any bullshit. I can not be around a certain type of person. The pieces of shit garbage I am talking about, were a side effect of a relationship I should never have gotten in in the first place. No matter which direction it came from, it was a bad decision, which let in people who I personally would not have willingly gotten mixed up with. That’s the root of my problems. The solution is when I meet a woman and possibly her friends, if my gut say “nope” or “this is going to be a problem for me, I known it” I don’t ride out the way, just to see, I cut it on the spot and that’s it. Before it even starts. I didn’t do that. I did at times, but I got talked back in, which was the wrong choice on my part.

What this means is options are much more limited. People are not people. For my own mental health. That’s what it’s about. In my experience, currently, it’s better to be single and living for yourself completely, that to be in constant aggravation over someone you don’t really want anything to do with it be around. The majority of people in existence, fall in the latter category. Unfortunately. To me. Which is what counts.

Like I said I am open, I don’t hate. But the only woman that gets me, is then one who gets me, without me telling her. It’s a specific type. I’m extremely intolerant from the experience I had with the people I speak of. I don’t have the patience. There’s been a few people after, people I have worked with that could tell you. Ten years ago, people I either liked you and you know it, I trust, but if you tested me, not that I was a threat, I wouldn’t throw my life away, but they were afraid of me. After all the shit Inwas talking about I was walking awymm If we just butt heads, we don’t like each other,